• What You Measure is What You Get.

    Einstein : Not everything that can be counted counts. And not everything that counts can be counted.
  • About me.

    I know enough to know that at 04.00am it gets dark out on the streets. It has done this for the last twenty odd years, to my knowledge and will probably continue for the forseeable future. At some stage in this ‘future’ I shall retire and probably won’t give a damn if it still gets dark at 04.00am. Until then I shall be out there, somewhere, lurking in the shadows because someone, somewhere will be doing stuff they shouldn’t and then, well then I will introduce myself. In the meanwhile I shall try to remain sane and remember why I joined in the first place and try to ignore all the people who piss me off by making the job more complicated than it should be.
  • Opinions

    Any opinions contained in posts are mine and mine alone. Many of them will not be those of any Police Force, Police Organisation or Police Service around this country. The opinions are based on many years of working within the field of practical operational Police work and reflect the desire to do things with the minimum of interference by way of duplication for the benefit of others who themselves do not do the same job. I recognise that we all perform a wide range of roles and this is essential to make the system work. If you don’t like what you see remember you are only one click on the mouse away from leaving. I accept no responsibility for the comments left by others.
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  • Recent Comments

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  • C.T.C. Constabulary.

    A Strategic Community Diversity Partnership. We are cutting bureaucracy and reducing the recording of target and monitoring related statistics. Our senior leaders will drive small, economical cars from our fleet surplus to save money to invest in better equipment for our frontline response officers. We are investing money to reinstate station canteens for the benefits of those 24/7 response officers. We have a pursuit policy. The message is that if you commit an offence and use a vehicle, we will follow you and stop you if necessary. It is your duty to stop when the lights and sirens are on. We take account of the findings of the Force questionnaire and are reducing the administration and management levels and returning these officers to frontline response duties. We insist on a work-life balance. We have no political masters. We are implimenting selection processes that take account of an individuals skills and proven abilities for the job. Our senior leaders will have one foot in reality and still possess the operational Policing skills they have long forgotton about and seldom used. All ranks are Police Officers first and specialists second. We will impliment career development and performance evaluation monitoring of our leaders by those officers who operate under that leadership. The most important role is that of Constable. All other roles are there to positively support the role and the responsibility of Constable and the duties performed.
  • Whichendbites

    “We trained very hard, but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we would be reorganised. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganising. It can be a wonderful method of creating the illusion of progress while creating confusion, inefficiency and demoralisation.”......Petronius
  • Just so.

    Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces.
  • Reality.

    Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.
  • Rank V’s Responsibility

    Don't confuse your idea of how important you are with the responsibility of your role.
  • Meetings.

    If you had to identify, in one word, why we will never achieve our full potential, Meetings would be that word.
  • There is always a bigger picture.

    When there is no answer to your problem, there is always deflection from the need to justify giving an answer.

Say it with chocolates

A  young woman who punched a policeman was spared jail because she had bought him a box of chocolates to apologise.

Kylie Fisk, 20, lashed out as officers tried to break up a brawl she was involved in outside her home. She screamed abuse, kicked a police car and punched Sergeant Alistair Livingstone in the mouth, leaving him with five deep scratch marks.

But she was shown mercy by District Judge David Copper after he was told she bought the officer a £3.10 box of Nestle chocolates in an attempt to say sorry.

The judge, sitting at South East Suffolk Magistrates’ Court, told Fisk: ‘That is a very sweet gesture. I have never heard of that happening before.

‘I have to consider compensation. You bought the police officer a box of chocolates, that is nice. You just go and give him that.’

But he added: ‘You have committed a very serious offence. It must never happen again or you will go to prison.’

I can only imagine that the sentencing guidelines recommend a list of chocolates to relate to the nature of the offence.

Lets see…………….

Milk Tray for assault.

Black Magic for burglary.

What could a luxury Belgian brand get you off with ?

You’d have thought the officer was worth at least a bottle of 12 year old single malt.

I wonder what she would have got if she had assaulted a Judge or a Magistrate ?

Our priority is you.

The Organisation, as always, tries its best to be seen to be getting best value. For the Organisation you understand. Efforts to promote the brand continue at Norfolk Constabulary to the extent they have arrived at the decision to invest some £35,000 to do this.

Perhaps they have got some funds returned from an Icelandic Bank, who knows ?

They have decided to invest several sackfuls of money in part of their re-branding of their Force badge.

Around £3,000 went on developing and designing the new version, while £25,000 will be needed to change signs around the county and another £6,700 to update patrol cars.

The rebranding, which is designed to be more ‘people-friendly’ will also include the words: ‘Our priority is you.’

Is there really that much difference ?

 Norfolk police logo  logo

Does this really make a difference ?

The redesign was, apparently, part of a modernisation programme to cut red tape and improve frontline policing. A spokesman suggested the new monotone crest would save money in the long-term by being cheaper to print. He added: ‘We’ve refreshed our corporate identity to underpin the direction of travel. We are making people – whether they are customers, witnesses, victims of crime or Bill the Burglar – our priority.

‘The former multi-coloured crest has been replaced by a smart, modern, monotone marque which is cheaper to reproduce.’

 ‘Working for a safer London’ became ‘Working together for a safer London’ a few years ago and the words were changed from a handwritten style to bland upright type. All this at a load of extra costs, claimed benefits to the Organisation and at great personal satisfaction to those who occupy the corporate corridors of power.

Never Forget.

Corporate posters.

The Joys of modern Policing. Found this over here, an interesting Photo taken outside New Scotland Yard.    What next? “You are being raped… ring 999 / You have been raped… ring  0300 123 1212 ”. I am sure there are very good reasons for this system, but if you’re going to use a different number, how about using a memorable one?

Counters counting the counted.

Being aware of the reported supposed reduction in crime it appears that all is not quite what it seems. Or at least not quite what it is supposed to seem. The other side of the coin appears to be a little different, as one would expect, unless you have the politician’sview of this after flipping their own two headed coin where there is absolutely no difference in the outcome.

Some police forces have been undercounting some of the most serious violent crimes in England and Wales, the Home Office has admitted.

This would be a little surprising for those who respond to reports of violence, threats of violence or disorder who would hazard a bit of a guess that violent crimes are increasing and not reducing as they are claimed.

But the Home Office is now facing a huge row and damage to its credibility after admitting  a major mistake in the way some police forces have counted some serious violence.

To make matters worse, this comes amid an ongoing three-way battle between the government, opposition and sections of the press over whether or not the streets of Britain are safe.

For the past year ministers have trumpeted figures that show that crime is down, violence is down and your risk of being a victim is the lowest since modern records began.

The statistics also show that while the risk of being a victim is at its lowest ever level, people still think that the rate is going up.

Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said she was “extremely pleased” with the overall reduction.

The annual crime report for 2007-2008 reveals the longest recorded period of falling crime – down 48% from 1995.

It shows there were five million recorded crimes. All the main categories were down, including violent crime

Today they insist that those three cornerstones of public confidence remain in place. But one very important figure on serious violence has been completely miscounted. And nobody knows how long some forces have been getting it wrong.

Violent crime is going down ?   I don’t see Home Secretary Jacqui Smith walking about on the Britannia Estate when it is dark. She might venture out into the controlled environment she believes to be the real world during the day with her entourage of PCSOs, for a bit of a photo shoot, but not in the real, real world when the atmosphere is a little less controlled and a damn sight more hostile.

At least when we are free from targets things should be a lot better.

If you are getting a little depressed by all this cheer yourself up with this…………  from Theo Spark.  If you are easily offended then you shouldn’t be here anyway and don’t click on the link.

Unwelcome visitors

We drive in a tight formation to the point where we have agreed to meet. Me and the other handler get out and enter one of the other vans to continue. We wait for a few moments. There is tension in the air and everyone has their job to do.

The line of Police vehicles begin to move off slowly. We wait, by the door. The radios give conflicting messages as some us are on one channel whilst others are on a differing channel. The people who make the decisions are talking to each other. The convoy stops again. From the rear of the van there is nothing to see. We move off, again.

I feel the van turn one way, then another. I hear the relayed locations and picture in my mind the route towards our target.

It is early. Very early. It is the time for morning workers, for postal workers, paper workers and milk delivery people to be at their chores. Unwelcome visitors also go about their business.

This morning we will be the unwelcome visitors.

This morning someone will be in for a bit of a surprise. They will be receiving an early morning call that they did not expect. The line of vehicles slows to a silent and covert halt. The doors are quietly opened and the Police sardine squad roll out to seek the cover of the nearby building lines as they stretch out squashed limbs. We are there too.

We assemble in our pre-arranged line and take a close position behind the door entry team. Within a few seconds we are in position and the door team go to work. As the door goes in we hear the sound that everyone dreads.

Suddenly we are alone. We have enough space to swing a dozen cats and deal with the menace that lies within. We are confronted by a beast with teeth enough for three dogs and a matching bad attitude. We are positive and the beast is swiftly restrained and subdued. The rest of the team speed through the gap we have created and move to secure and locate within a trice, like a well oiled machine.  The shouts of this and that secure, how many people are located and where they are echo around the place. The next wave enter and the system begins.

The beast is really not that bad and needs a friend for reassurance, which he gets.  I can’t blame the dog but I can blame the irresponsibility of the owner.

The surprise of our early morning call catches out those who should really be incarcerated.  The search is thorough and turns up some welcome results. Some wanted persons, some property recovered and some illegal drugs. This is only the beginning.

This morning we were unwelcome visitors, but on our terms. It felt good.

Police Dogs are different.

The calls come in on a regular basis. travel between the requests poses a problem with increasing time delays because of travel. Sometimes as soon as I am on the way to one call, another comes up local. Unfortunate, but sometimes it goes that way. There simply are not enough of us to go around.

After a couple of near misses and a bit of canine reassurance to response I get the one I am after. Only a few minutes away and most definitely a crime job.

Two men are stealing the wheels from a parked car, we have a witness on the phone and they are carrying the wheels around the corner. They must have a car nearby. I was thereabouts on foot not more than an hour ago. I do not need the latest overdue intel update from the important people. They are late and are off the pace. I had already got this from the nights briefing and the crime stats.

I stop my van a couple of streets away and make for the scene through lanes that offer covering routes to the thieves who prefer a foot approach.  This makes sense and puts me in with a shout.  Anyway, our vans are far too noisy to offer a chance to get really close. I come out about a hundred yards away and although I cannot see, it is clear that my mate can hear. He begins to pull towards the noises only he can hear.

Eventually I hear the sound of metal on metal. The last wheel is nearly off. In the distance I hear the fast approaching sound of response who are clearly responding, despite my request to be as quiet as they can to give me a chance. This will offer a warning and a quick decision to flee the scene. I act swiftly, shouting my usual warning as as I emerge from cover. 

One is still holding the wrench following wheel-nut removal wrench and the other carrying a wheel.  They almost run into each other as they decide what to do but it is too late and they are herded back towards the wall and contained by something they did not think they would encounter, especially with such inviting dentistry.

The dropped wheel has now rolled into the gutter a short distance away. They comply and sink to there knees. I know they will not run. That would be stupid and the consequences painful. Response take over and the usual display of bravado, not exhibited only a few short seconds ago, comes forth amid the security of handcuffs and impending incarceration. They’ve put on their show for each other and they can say afterwards how they didn’t take any crap from the Police.

Police Dogs are a little different.