Say it with chocolates

A  young woman who punched a policeman was spared jail because she had bought him a box of chocolates to apologise.

Kylie Fisk, 20, lashed out as officers tried to break up a brawl she was involved in outside her home. She screamed abuse, kicked a police car and punched Sergeant Alistair Livingstone in the mouth, leaving him with five deep scratch marks.

But she was shown mercy by District Judge David Copper after he was told she bought the officer a £3.10 box of Nestle chocolates in an attempt to say sorry.

The judge, sitting at South East Suffolk Magistrates’ Court, told Fisk: ‘That is a very sweet gesture. I have never heard of that happening before.

‘I have to consider compensation. You bought the police officer a box of chocolates, that is nice. You just go and give him that.’

But he added: ‘You have committed a very serious offence. It must never happen again or you will go to prison.’

I can only imagine that the sentencing guidelines recommend a list of chocolates to relate to the nature of the offence.

Lets see…………….

Milk Tray for assault.

Black Magic for burglary.

What could a luxury Belgian brand get you off with ?

You’d have thought the officer was worth at least a bottle of 12 year old single malt.

I wonder what she would have got if she had assaulted a Judge or a Magistrate ?

Our priority is you.

The Organisation, as always, tries its best to be seen to be getting best value. For the Organisation you understand. Efforts to promote the brand continue at Norfolk Constabulary to the extent they have arrived at the decision to invest some £35,000 to do this.

Perhaps they have got some funds returned from an Icelandic Bank, who knows ?

They have decided to invest several sackfuls of money in part of their re-branding of their Force badge.

Around £3,000 went on developing and designing the new version, while £25,000 will be needed to change signs around the county and another £6,700 to update patrol cars.

The rebranding, which is designed to be more ‘people-friendly’ will also include the words: ‘Our priority is you.’

Is there really that much difference ?

  

Does this really make a difference ?

The redesign was, apparently, part of a modernisation programme to cut red tape and improve frontline policing. A spokesman suggested the new monotone crest would save money in the long-term by being cheaper to print. He added: ‘We’ve refreshed our corporate identity to underpin the direction of travel. We are making people – whether they are customers, witnesses, victims of crime or Bill the Burglar – our priority.

‘The former multi-coloured crest has been replaced by a smart, modern, monotone marque which is cheaper to reproduce.’

 ’Working for a safer London’ became ‘Working together for a safer London’ a few years ago and the words were changed from a handwritten style to bland upright type. All this at a load of extra costs, claimed benefits to the Organisation and at great personal satisfaction to those who occupy the corporate corridors of power.

Never Forget.

Corporate posters.

The Joys of modern Policing. Found this over here, an interesting Photo taken outside New Scotland Yard.    What next? “You are being raped… ring 999 / You have been raped… ring  0300 123 1212 ”. I am sure there are very good reasons for this system, but if you’re going to use a different number, how about using a memorable one?

Counters counting the counted.

Being aware of the reported supposed reduction in crime it appears that all is not quite what it seems. Or at least not quite what it is supposed to seem. The other side of the coin appears to be a little different, as one would expect, unless you have the politician’sview of this after flipping their own two headed coin where there is absolutely no difference in the outcome.

Some police forces have been undercounting some of the most serious violent crimes in England and Wales, the Home Office has admitted.

This would be a little surprising for those who respond to reports of violence, threats of violence or disorder who would hazard a bit of a guess that violent crimes are increasing and not reducing as they are claimed.

But the Home Office is now facing a huge row and damage to its credibility after admitting  a major mistake in the way some police forces have counted some serious violence.

To make matters worse, this comes amid an ongoing three-way battle between the government, opposition and sections of the press over whether or not the streets of Britain are safe.

For the past year ministers have trumpeted figures that show that crime is down, violence is down and your risk of being a victim is the lowest since modern records began.

The statistics also show that while the risk of being a victim is at its lowest ever level, people still think that the rate is going up.

Home Secretary Jacqui Smith said she was “extremely pleased” with the overall reduction.

The annual crime report for 2007-2008 reveals the longest recorded period of falling crime – down 48% from 1995.

It shows there were five million recorded crimes. All the main categories were down, including violent crime

Today they insist that those three cornerstones of public confidence remain in place. But one very important figure on serious violence has been completely miscounted. And nobody knows how long some forces have been getting it wrong.

Violent crime is going down ?   I don’t see Home Secretary Jacqui Smith walking about on the Britannia Estate when it is dark. She might venture out into the controlled environment she believes to be the real world during the day with her entourage of PCSOs, for a bit of a photo shoot, but not in the real, real world when the atmosphere is a little less controlled and a damn sight more hostile.

At least when we are free from targets things should be a lot better.

If you are getting a little depressed by all this cheer yourself up with this…………  from Theo Spark.  If you are easily offended then you shouldn’t be here anyway and don’t click on the link.

Unwelcome visitors

We drive in a tight formation to the point where we have agreed to meet. Me and the other handler get out and enter one of the other vans to continue. We wait for a few moments. There is tension in the air and everyone has their job to do.

The line of Police vehicles begin to move off slowly. We wait, by the door. The radios give conflicting messages as some us are on one channel whilst others are on a differing channel. The people who make the decisions are talking to each other. The convoy stops again. From the rear of the van there is nothing to see. We move off, again.

I feel the van turn one way, then another. I hear the relayed locations and picture in my mind the route towards our target.

It is early. Very early. It is the time for morning workers, for postal workers, paper workers and milk delivery people to be at their chores. Unwelcome visitors also go about their business.

This morning we will be the unwelcome visitors.

This morning someone will be in for a bit of a surprise. They will be receiving an early morning call that they did not expect. The line of vehicles slows to a silent and covert halt. The doors are quietly opened and the Police sardine squad roll out to seek the cover of the nearby building lines as they stretch out squashed limbs. We are there too.

We assemble in our pre-arranged line and take a close position behind the door entry team. Within a few seconds we are in position and the door team go to work. As the door goes in we hear the sound that everyone dreads.

Suddenly we are alone. We have enough space to swing a dozen cats and deal with the menace that lies within. We are confronted by a beast with teeth enough for three dogs and a matching bad attitude. We are positive and the beast is swiftly restrained and subdued. The rest of the team speed through the gap we have created and move to secure and locate within a trice, like a well oiled machine.  The shouts of this and that secure, how many people are located and where they are echo around the place. The next wave enter and the system begins.

The beast is really not that bad and needs a friend for reassurance, which he gets.  I can’t blame the dog but I can blame the irresponsibility of the owner.

The surprise of our early morning call catches out those who should really be incarcerated.  The search is thorough and turns up some welcome results. Some wanted persons, some property recovered and some illegal drugs. This is only the beginning.

This morning we were unwelcome visitors, but on our terms. It felt good.

Police Dogs are different.

The calls come in on a regular basis. travel between the requests poses a problem with increasing time delays because of travel. Sometimes as soon as I am on the way to one call, another comes up local. Unfortunate, but sometimes it goes that way. There simply are not enough of us to go around.

After a couple of near misses and a bit of canine reassurance to response I get the one I am after. Only a few minutes away and most definitely a crime job.

Two men are stealing the wheels from a parked car, we have a witness on the phone and they are carrying the wheels around the corner. They must have a car nearby. I was thereabouts on foot not more than an hour ago. I do not need the latest overdue intel update from the important people. They are late and are off the pace. I had already got this from the nights briefing and the crime stats.

I stop my van a couple of streets away and make for the scene through lanes that offer covering routes to the thieves who prefer a foot approach.  This makes sense and puts me in with a shout.  Anyway, our vans are far too noisy to offer a chance to get really close. I come out about a hundred yards away and although I cannot see, it is clear that my mate can hear. He begins to pull towards the noises only he can hear.

Eventually I hear the sound of metal on metal. The last wheel is nearly off. In the distance I hear the fast approaching sound of response who are clearly responding, despite my request to be as quiet as they can to give me a chance. This will offer a warning and a quick decision to flee the scene. I act swiftly, shouting my usual warning as as I emerge from cover. 

One is still holding the wrench following wheel-nut removal wrench and the other carrying a wheel.  They almost run into each other as they decide what to do but it is too late and they are herded back towards the wall and contained by something they did not think they would encounter, especially with such inviting dentistry.

The dropped wheel has now rolled into the gutter a short distance away. They comply and sink to there knees. I know they will not run. That would be stupid and the consequences painful. Response take over and the usual display of bravado, not exhibited only a few short seconds ago, comes forth amid the security of handcuffs and impending incarceration. They’ve put on their show for each other and they can say afterwards how they didn’t take any crap from the Police.

Police Dogs are a little different.

Different Worlds

I roll up for briefing and take my chair, cuppa in hand and listen to whats going on in the world tonight.

In the CTCC we still have dog handlers who still work nights.

The shed and garage breaks on the Britannia Estate, the pub breaks that have moved just out of town to the small villages, the vehicle crime on the main ‘A’ routes across the Division, the domestics flagged for urgent attendance if the call comes in. These are just some of the things that are to be considered. District have 2 for handovers and three out dealing with response jobs. We know who has been released, who has been seen out in breach of curfew and several sightings from the last couple of nights that we know about on Division but the larger and more respected intel have not put into their system, therefore it does not exist.

We move on from the interesting stuff and get a taste of the messages from on high about how we are failing with our targets for completing crime investigations and other empire originated enquiries. What are they talking about ? This is their problem and I have enough of my own to deal with in this never ending world of justifying your existence to those who count things. The usual messages about their workload begin to appear, with all of them having overdue crimes, late submissions of stuff for follow up investigation. How they manage to get any of this done beats me, with the high demand of response jobs from shift to shift they are not blessed with much time to keep the workload above water. This does not include the stuff allocated by people with their own deadlines and a nifty way in shifting responsibility by way of email and the wondrous new computer recording methods that seem to be a gift for managing from behind a desk at the touch of a keyboard.

I have already checked my messages before the briefing and found out what the management team expect from me in the the time they think I swan about totally without purpose. I have various tasks where I am expected to put in the time in what they perceive to be my downtime. If only. And that is before I begin with the statistical recording I am expected to do to help them justify their existence in their carefully manicured and conditioned existence.

This wonder that is NIM gives me the current, accurate and latest information on where I am expected to patrol. So current accurate and the latest, in fact, that it is already weeks out of date. After 20 years I am capable of delegating my own time to where I see fit and my information is based on tried and tested sources. Local intel and crime stats, plus the latest word from the briefing file.

There is no need to rely on the larger intelligence machinery that has seen a growing trend in increased and duplicated accountability and micro-managing the lack of trust in those who patrol the streets when the crunchers and auditors are safe in their beds, their cosy little empires resting undisturbed till daylight beams forth on their efforts to tell people what they should be doing in respect of the latest target or emerging trend.

I stick with the latest trusted word from the nights skipper and will be floating around the area of choosing.

Tonight will be a good night. The Boss, Skipper and their group are pleased to see me and that is always a good start.

Crime prevention advice.

A gardener who fenced off his allotment with barbed wire after being targeted by thieves has been ordered to take it down – in case intruders scratch themselves.

Bill Malcolm erected the 3ft fence after thieves struck three times in just four months, stealing tools worth around £300 from his shed and ransacking his vegetable patch.

A spokesman for Bromsgrove council said: ‘With regard to the barbed wire, when this is identified on site, we are obliged to request its removal or remove it on health and safety grounds.’

Mr Malcolm’s plight comes just weeks after Bristol council angered allotment holders by urging them not to lock their sheds in case burglars damaged them breaking in.

So there it is. If you can’t protect your property, who is going to protect it for you ?

Public Services or investment profits ?

I have been hearing from the various forms of National media, who report that the local authorities have no extra money for services for old people, closure of hospital wards, libraries, schools being merged to save money etc etc etc etc etc etc…………………..cuts, cuts, cuts. All the time more cutbacks, because they have no funds or have efficiency saving targets to hit.

So if they have no money and are continually making cut backs, no extra money for essential public services and ALWAYS have to make cuts in their funding for just about everything, how the bloody hell can they put millions of pounds away in foreign banks ?

Just where does all of those portfolios of investments come from ?

Is their priority to provide local public services or to put money away for a rainy day that will never come ?

I thought that there was always a budget deficit and there was no extra money to go around. Now, it seems that almost every local authority has managed to get several or even tens of millions of pounds spare to invest in foreign banks.

I must remember that the next time there is a council meeting to decide how much the council taxes will go up because they have no money in the coffers.

It is not just the local councils but also some Police Authorities seem to have got their hands on some spare cash to stash away, presumably no claims of budgetary savings there then.

God job then, at the CTCC we have a nw mattress at the training wing where we are able to hide away our budget underspend instead of sending it to a Icelandic financial institution. £21.68p at the last count. The Police Authority meetings will have to settle for ginger nuts to have with their coffee for a few weeks.

More than three quarters of a billion pounds of local authority money is at risk after over 85 councils and other public bodies deposited the cash in Icelandic banks.

Here is a list of local authorities so far known to have been involved:

• Kent – £50 million (£15 million with Glitnir Bank, £17 million with Landsbanki and just over £18 million in its UK subsidiary, Heritable).
• Transport for London (£40 million deposit with Kaupthing Singer & Friedlander).
• Haringey (£37 million)
• The Metropolitan Police Authority (£30 million. Its total budget is £3.5 billion).
• Dorset County Council (£28.1 million in temporary loans to Landsbanki and Heritable)
• Barnet (£27.4 million)
• Northumberland County Council (£23 million).
• Hillingdon (£20 million)
• Westminster (£17 million)
• Brent (£15 million)
• Caerphilly County Borough Council (£15 million with Heritable and Landsbanki)
• West Sussex County Council (£12.9 million).
• Havering (£12.5 million)
• Cheltenham Borough Council (£11 million)
• Wakefield Council (£9 million)
• Cheshire County Council (£8.5 million invested with Heritable, 4% of the council’s total £200 million investment with national and international financial institutions. The council has a budget of £1 billion)
• Bassetlaw District Council in North Nottinghamshire (£8 million in Glitner, Heritable, Landsbanki and Singer Friedlander)
• Bristol City Council (£8 million invested in Landsbanki)
• Wiltshire County Council (£8 million with Heritable)
• South Lanarkshire (£7.5 million with Landsbanki and Heritable)
• Derwentside District Council (£7 million)
• Dorset Police Authority (£7 million of temporary loans to Landsbanki and Heritable)
• Redcar and Cleveland (£6 million)
• Ceredigion County Council (£5.5 million)
• North Lincolnshire Council (£5.5 million in Landsbanki and Heritable)
• Sutton (£5.5 million)
• Bromley (£5 million)
• South Ayrshire (£5 million)
• Cornwall County Council (£5 million invested with Landsbanki from total investments of £360 million)
• Gateshead Council (£4.5 million).
• Powys County Council (£4 million, about 6% of its cash investments, with two Icelandic banks – Landsbanki and Glitnir)
• Gwynedd Council (£4 million deposited with Heritable).
• Rotherham Borough Council (£3.7 million with Landsbanki and Heritable Bank)
• Flintshire County Council, North Wales (£3.7 million invested with Landsbanki)
• Rhondda Cynon Taf County Borough Council (£3 million deposited with Heritable).
• Solihull Metropolitan Borough Council (£3 million)
• North Somerset Council (£3 million with Landsbanki)
• Doncaster Council, in South Yorkshire (£3 million)
• Stroud District Council (£3 million)
• North East Lincolnshire Council (£2.5 million deposited with Landsbanki out of a total of £90 million of investments)
• Cotswold District Council (£2 million)
• Gloucester City Council (£2 million)
• Moray Council (£2 million deposited with Landsbanki)
• Monmouthshire County Council (£1.2 million with Heritable)
• Tewkesbury Borough Council (£1 million)
• Lewes District Council in East Sussex (£1 million deposited in Landsbanki)
• Perth and Kinross Council (£1 million with Glitnir bank)
• Nottingham City Council is also affected but has not yet disclosed the amount.

The BBC said these councils and bodies were also affected:

• Hertfordshire (£28 million)
• Somerset County Council (£25 million)
• Plymouth City Council (£13 million)
• Breckland Council (£12 million)
• Gloucestershire County Council (£12 million)
• Lancashire County Council (£10 million)
• West Oxfordshire District Council (£9 million)
• Wyre Forest District Council (£9 million)
• Daventry District Council (£8 million)
• Wiltshire County Council (£8 million)
• South Lanarkshire Council (£7.5 million)
• West Lindsey District Council (£7 million)
• Cherwell District Council (£6.5 million)
• Braintree District (£5 million)
• Buckinghamshire (£5 million)
• Exeter City Council (£5 million)
• Ipswich Borough Council (£5 million)
• Oxfordshire County Council (£5 million)
• Wokingham Borough Council (£5 million)
• Oxford City Council (£4.5 million)
• Colchester Borough Council (£4 million)
• East Lindsey District Council (£4 million)
• East Staffordshire Borough Council (£4 million)
• South Oxfordshire District Council (£2.5 million)
• Great Yarmouth (£2 million)
• Hertsmere Borough Council (£1 million)
• Kirklees Council (£1 million)
• Vale of White Horse District Council (£1 million)
• Winchester (£1 million)
• Amounts for Bracknell Forest, Burnley Council, Chorley Council, North Ayshire, Surrey County Council and Wychavon District Council are all to be confirmed.
• Sussex Police Authority (£6.8 million)
• Hertfordshire Police Authority (£3 million)
• Gwent Police Authority (£1 million)
• Rushmoor Borough Council confirmed it had a total of £2 million invested in Glitnir.
• Winchester City Council said it had £1 million invested in Heritable Bank. Council leader George Beckett said: “The council supports the representations by the Local Government Association to the Chancellor of the Exchequer to protect the interests of council tax payers.”

The following local authorities have confirmed they have no money invested in the affected banks:

• Brighton and Hove City Council.
• East Sussex Council.
• London Borough of Merton.
• Forest of Dean District Council.

Among the public bodies with about a billion pounds invested in Icelandic banks are police authorities, which stand to lose nearly £100 million.

Here is a list of the police authorities known to be affected and their investments:

• Dorset £7 million
• Dyfed-Powys £2 million
• Gwent £1 million
• Hertfordshire £3 million
• Humberside £5.75 million
• Kent £11.1 million
• Lancashire £0.67 million
• Metropolitan £30 million
• Northumbria £3.5 million
• South Wales £7 million
• Surrey £1.5 million
• Sussex £6.8 million
• Thames Valley £5 million
• West Midlands £5.4 million
• West Yorkshire £6 million
• Transport for London invested £40m.

British charities meanwhile could lose tens of millions of pounds.

Here is a list of some of the charities affected:

• Naomi House children’s hospice in Sutton Scotney, near Winchester, has £5.7 million of deposits invested with Kaupthing Singer & Friedlander, which has gone into administration.
• The Physiological Society in London has £523,000 invested with the same bank.
• Samaritans have links to KSF because it is the parent company of Investment Managers, which looks after the charity’s investment portfolio.