• What You Measure is What You Get.

    Einstein : Not everything that can be counted counts. And not everything that counts can be counted.
  • About me.

    I know enough to know that at 04.00am it gets dark out on the streets. It has done this for the last twenty odd years, to my knowledge and will probably continue for the forseeable future. At some stage in this ‘future’ I shall retire and probably won’t give a damn if it still gets dark at 04.00am. Until then I shall be out there, somewhere, lurking in the shadows because someone, somewhere will be doing stuff they shouldn’t and then, well then I will introduce myself. In the meanwhile I shall try to remain sane and remember why I joined in the first place and try to ignore all the people who piss me off by making the job more complicated than it should be.
  • Opinions

    Any opinions contained in posts are mine and mine alone. Many of them will not be those of any Police Force, Police Organisation or Police Service around this country. The opinions are based on many years of working within the field of practical operational Police work and reflect the desire to do things with the minimum of interference by way of duplication for the benefit of others who themselves do not do the same job. I recognise that we all perform a wide range of roles and this is essential to make the system work. If you don’t like what you see remember you are only one click on the mouse away from leaving. I accept no responsibility for the comments left by others.
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  • C.T.C. Constabulary.

    A Strategic Community Diversity Partnership. We are cutting bureaucracy and reducing the recording of target and monitoring related statistics. Our senior leaders will drive small, economical cars from our fleet surplus to save money to invest in better equipment for our frontline response officers. We are investing money to reinstate station canteens for the benefits of those 24/7 response officers. We have a pursuit policy. The message is that if you commit an offence and use a vehicle, we will follow you and stop you if necessary. It is your duty to stop when the lights and sirens are on. We take account of the findings of the Force questionnaire and are reducing the administration and management levels and returning these officers to frontline response duties. We insist on a work-life balance. We have no political masters. We are implimenting selection processes that take account of an individuals skills and proven abilities for the job. Our senior leaders will have one foot in reality and still possess the operational Policing skills they have long forgotton about and seldom used. All ranks are Police Officers first and specialists second. We will impliment career development and performance evaluation monitoring of our leaders by those officers who operate under that leadership. The most important role is that of Constable. All other roles are there to positively support the role and the responsibility of Constable and the duties performed.
  • Whichendbites

    “We trained very hard, but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we would be reorganised. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganising. It can be a wonderful method of creating the illusion of progress while creating confusion, inefficiency and demoralisation.”......Petronius
  • Just so.

    Taxation is just a sophisticated way of demanding money with menaces.
  • Reality.

    Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.
  • Rank V’s Responsibility

    Don't confuse your idea of how important you are with the responsibility of your role.
  • Meetings.

    If you had to identify, in one word, why we will never achieve our full potential, Meetings would be that word.
  • There is always a bigger picture.

    When there is no answer to your problem, there is always deflection from the need to justify giving an answer.

Why is it ?

Why is it that during an effort to flee from an offence or evade arrest, the suspect will crash through a series of gardens, laying waste to fences, plants, greenhouses and any number of other garden implements or ornaments which make the sound of this evasion or escape a deafening and totally noisy affair.

Add to this the extra disturbance of one or possibly several officers as part of the pursuit team and the noise levels rise to sometimes staggering proportions.

Add to this the noise of just about every dog in the vicinity beginning to bark as though their lives depended on it and you get some idea of the intensity of the aural severity that would have environmental officers drooling at the lips.

Add to this the high level din and organised daylight supplied from our brave officers of the Police Flying Core for those Forces lucky enough to have one of them helicopter things.

Add to this the noise of police radios of the officers on containment or who have begun searching the gardens or other area where the fugitive is suspected to be and it is surely a wonder that no one seems to be woken by all this commotion.

Enter stage left the dog handler and his trusty canine companion.

Suddenly everything is silent.

The first foot of the handler in a garden, the first paw over a fence or the first crack of a snapping twig and windows fly open. Some arsehole always seems to shout ” who the bloody hell are you” or ” What the f#+* are you doing in my garden”.

You couldn’t make it up.

3 Responses

  1. It sounds like somthing out of an ‘carry on’ film.
    ‘carry on constable’ would be appropiate, wouldn’t it!!

  2. Nice new header!

  3. I just wish there were more of you WEB, theres been many a time when we just have one unit on in the force and theyre always the other end when you need them. Theres nothing better than a handler and their landshark turning up usually bringing a swift end to the chase/hunt.

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