• What You Measure is What You Get.

    Einstein : Not everything that can be counted counts. And not everything that counts can be counted.

  • About me.

    I know enough to know that at 04.00am it gets dark out on the streets. It has done this for the last twenty odd years, to my knowledge and will probably continue for the forseeable future. At some stage in this ‘future’ I shall retire and probably won’t give a damn if it still gets dark at 04.00am. Until then I shall be out there, somewhere, lurking in the shadows because someone, somewhere will be doing stuff they shouldn’t and then, well then I will introduce myself. In the meanwhile I shall try to remain sane and remember why I joined in the first place and try to ignore all the people who piss me off by making the job more complicated than it should be.

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    Any opinions contained in posts are mine and mine alone. Many of them will not be those of any Police Force, Police Organisation or Police Service around this country. The opinions are based on many years of working within the field of practical operational Police work and reflect the desire to do things with the minimum of interference by way of duplication for the benefit of others who themselves do not do the same job. I recognise that we all perform a wide range of roles and this is essential to make the system work. If you don’t like what you see remember you are only one click on the mouse away from leaving. I accept no responsibility for the comments left by others.

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  • C.T.C. Constabulary.

    A Strategic Community Diversity Partnership. We are working harder than ever before in a multi agency innovative way for a clearer vision of a citizen focused framework and a transparently safer community through strategic empowerment to meet the demands of modern and efficient Policing in the 21st Century. We are moving forward and have a real momentum on the ground. We have a real determination to make your community safe. Exactly what does this all mean ? I don’t fully understand but it does sound pretty good. That could be important. If all else fails itis because we have made an honest error of judgement, made inadvertent mistakes and one of our partners has made an administrative oversight. Either way itis someone else’s fault. We have learnt from our mistakes and apologise.

  • Whichendbites

    “We trained very hard, but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams we would be reorganised. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganising. It can be a wonderful method of creating the illusion of progress while creating confusion, inefficiency and demoralisation.”......Petronius

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    Only in our dreams are we free. The rest of the time we need wages.

Plan A.

Posted on May 7, 2008 by whichendbites

Well the latest revolutions of the management carousel at the CTCC have landed at their respective offices. The winners and losers will be putting their strategic plans onto their respective tables and getting everyone to play the games according to their rules and to their daring new plan. I guess we will all be one big happy family again, working with each other and working for each other for a safer world and reducing bureaucracy to spend more time out there, serving our customers.

What are the dog handlers doing to reduce the number of fatal road accidents ?

I will have to pass on that one at the moment.

We have got the latest technological wizardry, at great expense I might add, which is going to make our lives easier. The ring of steel around all the known trouble spots. The wonder tool known as ANPR. Can’t wait.

It appears that we are to be involved and engaged so we understand the really big plan and everything we have done before is somehow not good enough any more. Can’t wait.

We have already had the new tactical plan and strategic way forward. There have been many new words and catchy if rather stupid phrases. I also suspect that we will also be due for a review, a management scare tactic that usually accompanies steps to put us in line to adopt the new plan A. The usual pathetic efforts at consultation, a caring & listening management structure that ticks boxes but does not camouflage the shafting stick very well.

As plan A’s go, they always seem to be for the benefit of people who I never see. This wonder of plan A also seems to take me further and further away from the people who best need my brand of support and form the bread and butter of my working hours.

I also suspect that there will be another new and radical idea on how I can supply statistics to assist with monitoring my performance under the new plan A. To ensure that I am ticking all the right boxes and helping to keep other disciples of the faith in jobs.

Plan A………………can’t wait. Shafting sticks in a nice summer shade of DPM should be the order of the day.

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2 Responses to “Plan A.”

  1. TheBinarySurfer, on May 9th, 2008 at 12:25 pm Said:

    Officers:”It’s a great bit bloody stick you’re not rodgering me with that”.
    Management:”No it’s a gentle suppository supposed to help you do your job. It won’t hurt and i’ll be gentle, and it’s for your own benefit really…”
    Officers:”Then why did you put your running shoes on, and why are you giving yourself a run up?

    That about right WEB?

  2. NARPO GRUMPS, on May 12th, 2008 at 9:37 am Said:

    I have worked with anpr, and alpr as it is known outside of the uk, for a number of years now. I remain amazed at what very senior officers claim it will do. I understand its going to solve everything for GMP from a quote i saw. The big danger for anpr, which is an excellent tool, is it becomes more than a tool, it becomes the reason for being. Those big friendly hairy things, that took a liking to my rear end and thighs at many a disturbance in the early 70’s, are brilliant as SUPPORT for anpr in two ways. They can find stashes, even inside tyres, almost anywhere in a vehicle (we used them at multi force/agency HGV checks in the 70’s with great success). They are also brilliant when the idiot in the stoley decides to do a u-turn on seing the anpr van, ususal pursuit and bail and offender lost - a dog quickly on the scene is as valuable as any helicopter.
    But, i get frightened to death when i hear of anpr in dog vans - what a total waste of all that training - if you want them to do something thats not searching/biting then let them walk round a park/town centre for 15 minutes - joe public loves it. I am waiting for the suggestion of handheld anpr for the mounties - won’t be long now! One country has already asked for handheld small boat registration readers - watch out thames div, your next!

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